Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I am one with the molecules
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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