if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Randomize
