Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
