What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
