I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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