I have demons in me.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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