he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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