Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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