I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
