so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
