Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize