have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
