Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
