Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
sick fucks of a feather flock together
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
