Plan B is the new Plan A
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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