considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
