You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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