how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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