i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
