Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
They took my balls.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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