What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
