Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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