that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
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