i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
