All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
vagina is talking i cant
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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