my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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