Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Randomize
