You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
