pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Im part way to drunk.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Randomize
