i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize