S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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