She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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