Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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