I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
His hands were made for my vagina.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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