Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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