ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
