Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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