I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
