His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize