Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
