You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
