You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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