What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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