sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
