What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
