i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
ok first of all what the fuck
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
