you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
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