Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
My penis needs a shock collar
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize