we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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