I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
We don't watch enough power rangers
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
